If you have an addictive personality, and like cheesy, but easy reads, then you should definitely get stuck into Fifty Shades Darker, book two, in the Fifty Shades Trilogy.
Before you get your knickers in a twist about whether this is time in your life you will never get back – you won’t! This book is pure unadulterated ‘kinky fuckery’, it’s very repetitive and is, at it’s core, a love story with a lot of shagging. In order to enjoy these books you have to suspend belief – it is after all ‘fiction’.
I am not sure how folk manage with Tolkien because I have it on good authority that ‘Hobbits’ and other mythical beasts don’t actually exist and that Tolkien actually made ‘Middle Earth’ up. This book is not real either – yes, it’s fantasy so can everyone please chill out for fuck’s sake.
So what is the big deal – why are so many women captivated by it’s allure? Well, I think to be honest it’s because Christian Grey is so into Ana and she is so into him. He’s hot, she’s hot and they are addicted to each other. Maybe that is a woman’s fantasy to have a super rich ginger billionaire make us cum at the drop of a hat while tying us up in knots. But I did catch my self thinking ‘Damn! I wish someone that I was that into, was that into me, in a sort of ‘Christian Grey way’. I don’t mean the butt plugs and the lashings but more that they found me irresistible and got a boner every time I bit my lip. You get the gist. The caveat though is that I don’t want any minger to find me irresistible it has to be someone I feel the same way about. Y’see, us women, we are never happy!
I loved the ‘will they, won’t they’ premise of Fifty Shades Darker. Yes, it is repetitive in places as Ana is still cumming at the drop of a hat and Mr Grey’s recovery erections are the stuff dreams are made of. They do bonk about five times a day, she never fanny farts, which to be honest she would definitely go off like a whoopee cushion in some of the positions he trusses her up into. But I can see that it would put people off if EL James wrote ‘and as he withdrew his manhood from her sex, she was mortified as her lips flapped together and she belted out the deepest, loudest, front bottom, blow off she had ever experienced.’
The sun is shining and if you want to read about love, wealth and some fairly unrealistic levels of kinky fuckery then crack open the chilled Pouilly Fume and indulge yourself in some more sickly, synthetic pudding of a read. If you take life too seriously and you can’t handle reading about it any which but loose then don’t bother. Therefore, ergo, if you want some cheap thrills and an easy read, then tuck in.
Find my review of Fifty Shades of Grey here