I have been thinking a lot about feminism and equality nowadays partly because despite my innate sense of I can do whatever the f*ck I want regardless of my gender, I somehow have ended up a married, subjugated, incarcerated, unpaid slave to my children and husband. Oh yes, and I earn money too. How the f*ck did that happen? The conclusion that I have come to is that the journey for equality is an impossible destination. Men and women are not equal just like salt and pepper are not equal. How do you make salt and pepper equal? You can’t – it’s impossible. Men and women can never be equal because we are completely different.
Before I get sucked into a debate of outraged hens clucking about equality – I am not saying that we give up the fight girls – I am just saying we need to change our tactics and play a different game. Salt and pepper, yin and yang, black and white – diametrically opposed differences between men and women has never been so heavily illustrated then in the film Restrepo, the documentary that accompanies Sebastian Junger’s book War. London City Mum and I had our first date, popcorn free in a private cinema in Soho House. (I loved the venue – in fact, I was struck by the notion it would be a great place to hire for a film and dinner night.)
The film is brilliant and compelling viewing but it’s not for the faint hearted. It’s like watching Band of Brothers, or Pacific but it’s not a drama with actors – it’s real. People really die. It’s raw and honest. But I sat in the cinema saddened by the impossible war. Like salt and pepper, like men and women, the Taliban and the US soldiers are diametrically opposed and they will never find solution, not in this decade. The only common ground is that both sides are fighting men and men need war.
I watched this film and I thought men really do need war. War is about the size of your penis. It is the ultimate knob battle. Men create weapons that are an extension of their penis and discharging these weapons is about hosing the planet with an explosively packed charge of destructive semen. The bigger the weapon, the bigger the penis, the more intensive the explosion, the more intensively they shoot their load. War and fighting is about men, hard ons and ejaculation. They are programmed to hunt, kill and protect their territory. But the men are out of control because the universe is out of balance.
Is America imperialist? “If you help me, I will make you rich” said the Major, to the Taliban elder. I am afraid my Star Wars analogy still stands. This film did not dispel it.
I have never shot a real gun but I am interested to know what it feels like because I can imagine it’s very empowering. Are there any weapons that can’t be matched with my penis and ejaculation metaphor? I don’t know enough about warfare and weapons to say this conclusively but this is what my instincts are saying.
Men like fighting and they like blowing sh*t up. They are united as a gender and they are in charge. Women fight with each other and let men get away with all sorts of unacceptable behaviour. We are not united. If women really united would we be able to stop war happening? It’s a pretty massive ask isn’t it? But someone has to cuff those men folk around the ear and put them on the naughty step. Let’s face it you wouldn’t let your husband and son masturbate in the living room would you? But it’s all right for them to go discharging their weapons when someone takes their lolly is it?
You can make up your own mind. If you want to see Restrepo there’s another preview 24th August, 6pm Soho House – email: Anna Sissons – email@example.com – You can tell her I sent you 😉