Writing this blog today feels like an indulgent luxury. I have been so f*cking busy that I haven’t had time to blog in that just chewing the fat, this is what is going down in my hood kinda way. Finally, I can focus on my future and start building the business that I want but I’ll come back to that in a minute.
In the rollercoaster that is my world I have been stepping out and meeting fellow creatives and virtually meeting fellow feminists. I have come two over-riding observations:
1.) The world wants more strong, independent women. However, strong women are not liked. I am a strong woman and I am not popular or well liked. I have my own opinion and I don’t say what people want to hear. People don’t like this and they don’t like me for my honesty. This oxymoron creates a huge barrier for women. We can’t raise our daughters to be popular and well liked and strive for independence because to cut your own path it is imperative that you don’t give a f*ck what other people think and that is never the popular option. This doesn’t mean women shouldn’t take guidance or steering, or they should ignore those who are wiser, because most of our journeys are about gathering knowledge and applying that learning. But more that being independent and strong is about deciding what you want out of life and striving for those goals regardless of the goals of others. In business it’s called strategy.
2.) Radical feminism is dominated by lesbians who think of men as male oppressors and want a utopian man free world. It wasn’t until I joined the Facebook group ‘Feminism!’ that I realised that in comparison to true radical feminists I am actually a homemaking, man loving, Daily Fail reading (I don’t read the Daily Fail really), facist cop out.
These two observations pose many ethical and intellectual challenges for me. The sort of challenges that create weakness, self doubt and wishy washyness.
Having lived in military quarters for 11 years and being viewed as a troublemaking, leftish (compared to the regular military lemmings), feminist, alcoholic, queen bee type and then moving to The Shire where the ruling elite are tweed wearing, posh people who do actually read the Daily Mail and vote UKIP. I have been sat here smugly reading progressive sites – such as Jezebel, Pink News and The Root so that I can keep up to date with the voice of emerging and fighting groups – confident that I was a liberal open minded feminist with a dream of living off grid, in a world where women were strong and independent, and not continually exploited; but also with a bit of travel to exotic destinations thrown in for good measure. Now, I realise that I lack conviction and integrity and that in truth I have a lot of learning to do.
Rather than feeling threatened and withdrawing by this new status quo of my liberal feminism and my unpopular, strong, independent stance I have decided to own it. A bit like owning my curves, my age, my reality and instead of denying it, I am coming terms with it, and using it as part of the way forward.
2015 is a year of new beginnings. Especially for me. I am focusing on my businesses and creative projects and looking forward to seeing how the future will unfold.
The next book – Looking For Mr Rabbit will be edited and re-worked.
This playlist will bring you up to speed with Looking For Mr Rabbit – the story so far…..
The play – Opposites Attract will be developed for the stage
The blog will be re-branded and will incorporate Clare Macnaughton into the brand. I will have two new logos and a new blog theme.
I will be developing regular features – food, politics, reviews and living.
I will be connecting with a wider audience; Wiltshire women and other bloggers.
I will sort out my subscription platforms, so that I can keep you all informed.
I will be looking at how to expand into a retail based offer.
I will be growing the reach of the free A5 Warminster magazine.
There are few ideas in the pipeline – a pop up cafe and maybe some social media, PR courses, etc, so watch this space.
Hagar, the estranged husband has a year in post left in his current job and then he is faced with a very difficult decision his career, or his kids – yes, folks it’s that simple. His current job is demanding but delightful as he gets to spend time with his family and those that execute the military doctrine in his current role have no beef with me and I have no beef with them. Recently, there was a little incident with a spineless, lying element of the executors of military doctrine which, when I think about it makes my blood boil, and I feel like having a little fight with the assholes but as I am being all positive and spiritual I am, for now, letting it go.
I have had to do a little bit of Facebook blocking to some factions of my past life, especially related to the time I lived in military quarters because, ultimately, I would rather not have their toxic voyeurism via Facebook. Of course, if they want to come over to here and have a little nosey I have no problem with that at all. This little blockathon was triggered by the spineless, lying executor of military doctrine, who reminded me of the unprofessional, nepotistic, empire building elements of the military business which I despise; and also that there are people who occupy the military extended family that are very unpleasant and not to be trusted. Luckily for me as an unpopular, strong, independent women, who is owning her new destiny, I am ready as ever to stand my ground, although I doubt the spineless lemmings will have the courage, or even care enough, to confront the truth. They are all smug and comfy in their ivory towers, with their buddies, blowing sunshine out of each other’s arseholes to even give a shit about who they are shafting. Blimey, where did that little toxic rant come from? You see the poison of the past in some ways still occupies my veins if I feed it with my thoughts so begone nastiness; onwards and upwards.
Life at the moment is more sunshine and lollipops. Christmas is coming and it’s truly magical time at Christmas at my house so I leave you this to enjoy and just in case you were wondering this is how I feel…..Nina Simone – Feeling Good….
This blog is managed by Clare Macnaughton; a modern military mother; a feminist, British military spouse, and lifestyle journalist, writing about real life adventures.
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