I Quit!

GUEST POST – Sista Blista handed in her notice to a blue chip corporate because her boss is a knobhead. I found her resignation note in the bin and thought f*ck it – I’ll post that for her. I am sure she meant for it to be out there really.

Dear Boss

Bad news. I quit.

Laters!
Sista Blista

p.s. do you think it would be entirely unreasonable to let me keep my work phone? I mean, not for the calls or the emails or stuff like that, but because I have all my photos on it and trying to download them or even – heaven forbid – email them to myself, would it be, like, a total pain in the back side. Whaddya think?

p.p.s. I am running out of post-it pads at home so do you think it would be okay to take with me the pile I have stashed in my pedestal (because getting access to the stationary cabinet is ridiculous when there is only one key which is hidden away, for some idiotic reason) as my desk is likely to remain vacant for the next six months? I really like the bright green ones, btw.

p.p.p.s. before I forget, can you sign off the advance booking for Ladies Day at Ascot 2012/2013/2014, as I got such a fantastic deal on the ‘buy two, get one free’ before we had the freeze on corporate entertainment? Don’t forget I invited your wife too.

p.p.p.p.s. I’ll return the company car at year end, if that’s okay with you, as I have taken the opportunity during my garden leave to tour Europe, the Middle East and Africa. I’ll send postcards, promise.

p.p.p.p.p.s. if a persistent headhunter by the name of Barry calls asking for me, can you please tell him that I am contemplating a career change and an advanced course in rocket propulsion and design, preferably one with him attached to it.

p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I sent you an invite on Facebook – can you accept?