May is National Masturbation Month

According to The Examiner, a media in good ole US of A – May is National Masturbation Month

It is in response to a very, very, very senior doctor in the USA who was fired for saying that wanking is good for you and if younger people concentrated on bashing one out instead of bashing one in there would be less teenage pregnancies. A few years ago, I was lucky enough to have a conversation with a serving officer, who had experienced a few problems with his seminal plumbing while he was out in Afghanistan. The doc had told him that he needed to masturbate at least twice week in order to flush out his tubes. Women who masturbate regularly are less likely to suffer yeast infections. Masturbation is sort of an orgasmic flush.

Yet, it’s ok for men to say they regularly toss one off and many films humorously depict men’s endeavours to secure some peace and quiet to enjoy some self pleasuring. There is the apple pie scene in American Pie, or Jay from The Inbetweener’s Dead Hand Gang exploits. Or even the classic Peter Cook and Dudley Moore radio sketch ‘I was having a wank’

But women don’t get such comic interludes and frequent depiction about their self pleasuring unless we are embarrassed on the discovery of our vibrator – think Steve Martin discovering Dianne Wiest vibrator in Parenthood. Women don’t wank and if we do, we don’t admit it publicly, we only admit it to people we trust who also secretly admit it. There is still a taboo around whether it is ok for women to wank. The bottom line is this – how do you know if you have experienced an orgasm if you don’t find out for yourself what an orgasm feels like. Masturbating is the best insurance in guaranteed orgasm every time. Think about that. Anyway as May is Masturbation Month I thought that I would celebrate it with this blog post and so to finish let me play you out with this fabulous song by Ivor Biggun – The Winker’s Song

 

Although, clearly I don’t do such a thing. I am indeed a nun, who doesn’t have a dirty habit. #Justsaying

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6 Comments

  1. Aly May 17, 2012 Reply

    I’m sharing this around.It’s funny how we can be so open about some things but close minded about others.

    • A Modern Military Mother May 17, 2012 Reply

      Thanks! Yes – it’s still a taboo. To be honest I struggle to be open and honest about it myself. Hence the last sentence!

  2. Lady Estrogen May 17, 2012 Reply

    Yes, totally agree with you there.
    I’ve written about my wanks a couple times and how even though I’ve been doing it from a very young age, it was only until last year that I could bring myself to orgasm.
    I always needed a guy to do it. WELL NO MORE, SISTA!
    Hubs knows he is now slightly obsolete. Oops.

    • A Modern Military Mother May 17, 2012 Reply

      Seriously!!! This is very interesting. Relaxing is the key to cumming….it requires an almost spiritual level of relaxation. I had an epiphany when I was 16 and Cosmo was all about ‘orgasms’ thinking how will I know if I have had one if I don’t know what one is like. And so it began…..

  3. EmmaK May 17, 2012 Reply

    Well said. Indeed, masturbation is a calorie-free snack you can eat between meals without ruining your waistline. Here’s the rub:

    http://www.inthepowderroom.com/feel-it/wheres-the-rub.html

    • A Modern Military Mother May 17, 2012 Reply

      Ha love it!! And 3 years on we are still struggling to fess up to self pleasuring. It’s not so much admitting it to our female friends but actually fessing up the fella that we like to stick our hands down our knickers and have a fiddle about! Especially after we spend our days telling our sons ‘to leave it alone for Christ’s sake!’

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